Good afternoon, everyone. Today, I want to discuss the importance of teaching victims confidence. Sadly, I have noticed that too many people often focus on punishing the bullies for their evil actions. Not that it’s a bad thing because bullies need to be forced to take responsibility for what they do to people, otherwise, they will go on to victimize others and ruin lives. However, we must also focus on helping victims heal and teaching them the confidence needed to bully-proof themselves.
If the victim does not have the confidence to defend themselves properly, there is a strong chance that they will continue to attract predatory people like a magnet!
Remember that bullies are persistent. They do not give up easily. A bully will not take the punishment gracefully, apologize to the victim and simply leave them alone. No. This only happens on television or in the movies. In the real world, anytime a bully is exposed and reprimanded by authority for harassing their victim, it teaches them nothing.
In most cases, it only further pisses the bully off…AT THE VICTIM! The bully will blame the victim for the humiliation of being exposed and will often intensify the harassment once they return to class from suspension. The torment will then escalate to physical violence! The cycle of bullying will continue and the target’s self-esteem will be further damaged and the person may stop reporting the harassment, due to the threat of being physically harmed.
Even if the bully has a change of heart or is moved away from the victim, chances are that because the target’s self-esteem is still shattered, they will be victimized by other bullies and the harassment will continue, possibly throughout their lifetime if the victim doesn’t resort to suicide first.
Remember that any pack of wild animals (lions, tigers, wolves, etc.) will stalk a heard of prey. They will select and attack the animal that is the weakest/easiest of that heard (the animal that is sick, injured, weak, slow, a runt, a baby animal, etc.). Bullies, although human, in my opinion, are no different!
Therefore, bullying is a cycle. And just as bullies need to be exposed and punished, victims also need a peaceful environment that they can retreat to for healing and confidence building. Unless victims are taught the confidence needed to protect themselves, they will never be able to protect themselves effectively and will always be ripe for the next abuser that comes along.
Have a wonderful week ahead, everyone!