Before I begin, I would like to apologize to my readers and followers for having not posted in a while. I’m truly sorry. My husband, Mike has been ill and I’ve had to put blogging and writing on the back burner to take care of him. Please pray that the doctors can find what is wrong and he gets a positive outcome to his treatment! Thank you all in advance!
LEVEL 3: LOVE AND BELONGINGNESS- TRUST, ACCEPTANCE, AFFECTION, BEING PART OF A GROUP
This is also a biggie! When you are bullied there is no sense of love and belongness because the victim has been denied any sense of either one.
A. Trust- Anytime you are bullied, especially over a long period of time, your trust in humanity naturally begins to wane. Each attack, each taunt, each insult, each punch, shove, kick, erodes that truth in people a little more and a little more until trust is completely depleted. On the other hand, because of vicious lies and rumors which are often spread by bullies, the victim is not trusted by others as well and is even regarded as someone to be suspicious of. Therefore, people do not trust the victim either and lack of trust becomes, sadly, mutual.
B. Acceptance- When a victim is bullied, he/she isn’t accepted, often by anyone…period. Because the bully often goes around “campaigning” against the victim and encouraging others to exclude the target, he/she is denied acceptance not only by the bully his/herself, but others as well.
C. Affection- goes hand in hand with acceptance. When a victim of bullying is denied acceptance, then they are denied the affection, which goes with it!
D. Being a Part of a Group- Bullying excludes victims from not only the group doing the bullying, but the bullies may encourage other groups to exclude the victim. Remember that bullying is a goal and campaign, all designed to destroy the victim (reputation, opportunities and friendships). Once bullies have gotten the word out to enough people that the victim is less than desirable, the victim is then denied the luxury of being a part of any group. Which is the reason that most victims are loners.
Anytime you are a victim of bullying, Love and Belongingness are lost, as is trust (on both ends), acceptance, affection and inclusion into a group. It is a very lonely existence!
The focus of the next post will be Level 4: Esteem- Achievement, Mastery, Independence, Status, Dominance, Prestige, Self-respect, Respect from others.