“In order to insult me, I must first value your opinion. Nice try, though!”
~ T-Ronn Hicks ~
It’s a shame I didn’t realize this nugget of truth when I was young, but it’s true! When we value someone’s opinion of us, we’re naturally going to be hurt, angry, upset, insulted; if their opinions of you aren’t favorable.
The people who we consider important and can help to grow and shape us into better human beings- those who lift us up, help us to feel better about ourselves, and encourage us to reach our goals (our families, friends, best teachers, mentors, and supervisors) are those whose opinions we should value.
On the other hand, if we don’t consider certain people important, we will not value their opinions. Also, some people do not deserve to have their opinions valued by us, and those people are those who hurt or abuse us.
Bullies are such people.
I want you to understand that if a person hurts you physically, emotionally, psychologically, or socially, any opinions that person has of you hold no value and should be considered null and void!
That person should be of no importance to you whatsoever because they can bring absolutely no good to you or your life!
You should only value the opinions of those who love and care about you and are down for your good and your advancement! Not of those who continually tear you down, wreck your self-esteem, and belittle you. They should have zero significance to you.
It doesn’t matter if they are in a high position, the most popular person, have the most money, etc. If they consistently tear you down, they’re no good to you, and you should just blow them and their opinions off and keep going.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t assert yourself if someone violates your boundaries because you should! However, don’t let it cause you to feel bad about yourself or love yourself any less. Blow off the petty put-downs of bullies because, more than likely, the insults they spew have no merit in the first place!
I know it’s not easy. Believe me. I’ve been there. It took too many years for me to finally realize this important rule of life, but I’m glad I finally did. Better late than never.
But I want you to know that you can do it. How you give these leaches to your confidence, the boot is to avoid them as much as possible and only keep company with the people who have your best at heart. You will know who these people are. Your gut will tell you. So, listen to that gut instinct and pay attention to the vibes others around you put out!
I guarantee you that you will thank yourself later!