22 Good Responses to Bullying

It takes knowing bullying behavior when you see it and setting boundaries. We should respond (not react) to it right away and with conviction. And when you respond, you must respond with commands, not questions. What I mean by my last sentence is that instead of asking, “What did I ever do to you,” say, “Stop!” or “Knock it off!”

Because anytime we respond to bullies with questions, it only re-enforces their behavior.

Here are a few responses to different types of bullying:

The silent treatment

Return the silent treatment

Pull out a book and read it.

Walk away.

Put in earbuds and listen to music.

 

Verbal Abuse and Bullying

Firmly and authoritatively say,

“Stop that!”

“Cut it out!”

And put your hand out like a traffic cop.

Bullying disguised as jokes

“Knock it off!”

“Don’t be a moron!”

“Cut it out!”

 

A bully who judges you or criticizes

“Shut up!”

“Mind your own business!”

“Nobody asked you!”

“That’s enough!”

Responses to Trivialization

“I’m not having this conversation with you.”

“I’ve heard all I want to hear from you.”

 

When bullies undermine you

“Knock it off!”

“I’m not having this discussion with you!”

Defending their rights concept. Silhouette of hands pointing, denouncing the hand that defends their rights

When bullies threaten you

“Stop threatening me!”

“Leave me alone!”

“I don’t want to hear it!”

“Get away from me!”

 

When bullies make demands or give you orders

“I don’t respond to demands.”

“I don’t take orders.”

These are just a few good responses to the different types of bullying. Remember that you have a right to be treated well and you don’t have to take abuse from anyone.

WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU, “YOU AIN’T WORTH S**T”, YOU TELL THEM THIS… — BE BLESSTIFIED!

Minister Aldtric Johnson of  the “Be Blesstified” blog is a talented blogger and this is a must read for anyone who is a target of bullying. Not only is his post packed with truths that we don’t often think about, but it’s also pack with good humor! I can tell you that not only did I learn a few things, but I was in stitches as I read it! So please take the time to read the post below, you’ll be so glad you did!

picsart_01-26-07271301698.jpg

Don’t worry, I’m not going rated ‘R’ on you but, I really think this is going to bless someone. This is a much too common insult in our culture, and yes, the bad grammar is always intentional… “You ain’t worth s**t! Of course, implying that someone doesn’t have the value of feces, crap, refuse, doo-doo, […]

WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU, “YOU AIN’T WORTH S**T”, YOU TELL THEM THIS… — BE BLESSTIFIED!

Doing What Ya Gotta Do is Sometimes Doing What You Wouldn’t Normally Do

Anytime you’re bullied, you become desperate and will go to any means to take the bad spotlight off yourself. Many times, I would pit a few of my classmates against each other. If I knew of a few who disliked or hated each other, I’d very quietly and slyly pit them against each other.

An offhand comment here, another there, and I’d have them fighting among themselves. Yeah, I know, it was a shady thing to do. However, if I could keep them fighting among themselves, then I could distract their attention and hostility away from me and thus, keep the spotlight away!

Again, when you’re chronically bullied like I was, you’ll do anything and I mean anything to get a nice, albeit short, a reprieve from all the drama. And sometimes, “ya gotta do what ya gotta do” to keep yourself safe- even though it isn’t necessarily the right thing to do.

I understand. You never set out to cause anyone harm. You don’t want to cause discord. However, sometimes you’ll do what you normally wouldn’t do to protect yourself. So, if you have to, keep them too busy fighting each other to even think about you, I completely understand your position. Your only goal is to keep yourself safe!

Sometime later, I’ll give you more detailed pointers on how I did it.
Until next post! Stay safe and stay well!

28 Affirmations That Help Boost Confidence and Self-Esteem

I love being me – positive affirmation – handwriting on napkin with a cup of coffee

Affirmations That Help Boost Confidence and Self-Esteem

NOTE: Parts of this blog post references the following:

(“Stopping Wife Abuse,” Jennifer Baker Flaming, 1979, p.64)

(“The Verbally Abusive Relationship,” Patricia Evans, 2010, p.149)

1.I am not to blame for being bullied.

2. I am not the cause of someone else’s abhorrent behavior.

3. I deserve to be free from bullying and abuse.

4. It is okay for me to say “no” to what I don’t like nor want.

5. I do not have to take it.

6. I am important.

7. I am worthwhile.

8. I deserve to be treated with respect.

9. I have the power to create a good life for myself.

10. It’s okay for me to take care of myself.

11. Only I can decide what’s best for me.

12. I’m not alone. I have people who love me.

13. I am worth fighting for.

14. I deserve to be safe.

15. I deserve to be happy.

16. I am beautiful.

17. I am smart.

18. I am a good person.

19. I can live my life the way I want and on my terms.

20. I am loved.

21. It’s okay to love myself.

22. It’s okay to celebrate myself.

23. It’s okay for me to make mistakes.

24. It’s okay to put myself first.

25. It’s okay to protect and defend myself.

26. It’s okay to ask for help.

27. My life matters.

28. I matter.

Life’s Most Embarrassing Typos

I’m sure we’ve all accidentally posted typos that were downright embarrassing and once we read it after it was too late, we slapped our foreheads if if we’d “had a V8.”

Here’s my story:

While blogging recently, I replied to a thank you post from one of my readers, typing, or should I say, meaning to type,

“My pleasure, honey.” and sent the reply.

Feeling satisfied with what I’d typed (or what I’d thought I typed), I rose from my computer chair and went to the wash room long enough to load the washer with last weeks dirty clothes.

Once I started the wash, I came back to my computer. I looked on the screen and when I saw it, my mouth dropped and chin fell to the floor as I jumped with shock!

I had accidentally typed,

“My pleasure, horny.”

I could feel my cheeks sting and my face turn 10 shades of red. My mind screamed, “Oh, Lord! I did not!

My mind went into a panic as I wondered how many people had seen it in the time it took for me to get up, go load the wash, turn it on, and come back. This is language I don’t normally use. So, you can imagine how I was scrambling on my keyboard and typing feverishly to edit that reply!

Once the reply was corrected and saved, I could only breathe a sigh of relief. Now that it’s over, I can only laugh. I think it’s healthy to poke fun of yourself sometimes.

How many of you have accidentally made embarrassing typos like this? Feel free to comment below. Let’s make it fun!