One Situation Where People Are Likely to Accuse You of Being a Bully

blame point fingers

It’s when you don’t feel comfortable around a particular person. Understand that just because you prefer not to be around someone doesn’t necessarily make you a bully and you may have legitimate and justifiable reasons for it. Let’s face it, we like who we like and we dislike who we dislike.

What if the person creeps you out? What if you just don’t feel safe around the person? What if the person is toxic and constantly dogs your mood?

Naturally, you will try to avoid this person. In fact, no sensible and healthy human being would want to be around such a person. But be prepared for a few clueless others to throw the label of “bully” in your face.

Know that, anytime the internal alarm in the pit of your gut sounds off because you sense that something is “off” about a certain person, you have every right to ensure your own safety. You not only have a right, but an obligation to yourself to steer clear of the suspicious person.

Today, we live in a culture of fruit-bats who are so quick to cry “bully” anytime you listen to your own intuition and avoid a potentially dangerous person. Be that as it may, you still have a right to protect yourself from creeps, pedophiles, rapists, murderers, grifters, and other such nefarious people.

And you can bet that those “clueless others” who judge you wouldn’t stay around someone who gave them the heebie-jeebies either, only they’d never tell you. Sadly, the world is full of hypocrites.

And the unspoken messages these people send are clear:

“Safety and protection for us but not for you.”

“It’s bad when you do it but it’s okay when we do it!”

Don’t let these types of people confuse you. Realize that you don’t have to justify yourself to them or anyone! When you’re only trying to keep yourself safe physically or psychologically, no explanation is needed! And if others unfairly judge you for being uncomfortable around someone, then perhaps, you should really piss them off by adding their names to your checklist of idiots to avoid.

Again, not wanting to be around someone isn’t bullying. You are not seeking to hurt them, you just prefer not to be near them for your own peace of mind. It’s only when we seek to repeatedly and ritually harm that person that it crosses the line into bullying.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

38 thoughts on “One Situation Where People Are Likely to Accuse You of Being a Bully

  1. We used to call this having good boundaries back in the day. One caveat, and that is folks raised in dysfunctional families need to check their guts. Their survival instincts may have more to do with surviving, say, in an alcoholic family than surviving out in the world. Thanks for your Blog.

  2. Interesting post, especially when you speak of toxic people, I am watching Season 3 of “The Sinner” in which we see an excellent Matt Bomer playing a character called Jamie. He came under the spell of a toxic friend in college. Years later, he contacted that chap, and came under his spell again.

    And we are seeing his life unravel.

    Toxic people come in all shapes, sizes, and forms. They are dangerous, especially when they get under your skin

  3. This is very instructive. My gut sounds the alarm all the time. But I always feel I’m wrong to want to get away. I get bad vibes from some people almost everywhere I go…but always feel bad for acting. Maybe bullies train you not to listen to your gut so that they can keep bullying? Thanks ❤️❤️

  4. We so need to trust our instincts! I learned a long time ago to not even to break bread with people who scrutinize my food or other peoples. In a staffroom there can be some “holier than high ground” about dieting, food and portion size and have experienced lateral bullying over something as small as bagged lunches. On an upside, I now watch for that in my classes with my students- cause kids can easily pick up everything they see and hear! People should be able to at least eat in peace!

    • I couldn’t agree more, Kim! We should cleanse our lives of these infectious people! And what business is it of anyone’s what food you put in your mouth! oooo girl! People make me ill sometimes! 🤢🤮

  5. I think Cherie it is just like in keeping the body a temple- I have become good not to view, listen, watch or read anything that is violent, explosive or vicious to children, women and humanity in general. Even the news can make me feel great sadness and pain- so I am cautious in that area as well. Too many of us I think have become entitled and empowered sharing their opinion freely- welcomed or not. That is when I excuse myself from the proverbial table and leave.

    • You’re absolutely right, Kim. We should treat our minds as a temple just as we do our bodies. And you’re doing the best thing right there- you turn around and walk away, and that’s the smartest thing to do!

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