Here’s What Hate Does to the Hater

As we know, although the hated are affected by hatred, hate does more damage to the hater than to the hated because it eats the hater’s soul out from the inside. Here’s what else hate does to the hater.

It numbs their conscience and dulls their reasoning. Their minds are so consumed that all they can focus on are ways to harm the object of their hatred. It causes them to give a pass to things they would otherwise deem the most depraved, most heinous, and the most appalling atrocities just as long as they’re committed against the person they hate.

This is why hate can turn the kindest people into the vilest monsters. Because if it’s someone they hate taking the most insidious abuse, they’re more likely to stand by and watch it happen- and with a smile on their face.

The hater will be kind and gentle to anyone else, even total strangers, but to the person they hate, they will only brutalize.

Understand that if you’re a target of bullying and the object of hate, your bullies and haters have a sick and twisted obsession with you. They can’t get you out of their minds and they want to hurt you as much as they possibly can. Yes! Hate is an obsession. And it won’t only destroy you if you let it. It will destroy your bullies too.

The bright side of being hated is this. You can choose whether to let your haters get to you or not.

You have the delicious power to re-frame your thinking and realize that the hate is only hurting your haters. That their hate comes from something inside them, not something you did or said and not because there’s something wrong with you.

Then you can sit back, eat your popcorn, and watch them eat their hearts out and self-destruct. There’s a degree of dignity in being hated.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

34 thoughts on “Here’s What Hate Does to the Hater

  1. Thanks for this one, it helped. I have been working on this myself recently. It has become very easy for me to see the hate my Bullies have for me, it comes out in their writings. Their perceptions of me is skewed by their hate and negative feelings, so it affects everything they say about me. People are not that willing to believe someone who is so negative and hateful towards another all the time, I have learned. No one would accept their description of me as it is, as no one is that bad all the time! I am getting there, and appreciate your helpful words the past few yrs!

    • Thank you so much, Stella! This means a lot and I’m so glad this is helping you see through your bullies and see their torment for what it is. Blessings to you, sweetie!

  2. A few of my haters must be crying themselves to sleep at night, as for all their efforts, my Everlasting Father Yeshua still blesses me tremendously. I still have His favour and the loveliest marriage of almost 35 years. And we have a party trick : we are shape-shifters. Don’t look like we did in 1987 at all.😂😂

  3. I am very grateful to not be a hater even though I was raised by a diehard-hater who had nothing great ever to say about anyone! I learned at 5 that when my mother expressed bias that I would think the opposite. It has served me well! I am blessed that my heart did not turn hard despite early issues in my dysfunctional home; instead my heart is light. I am no saint, but I may dislike something or someone based on experiences and (mis) treatment, but ‘Hate” who has time for that. Karma looks after me and I need not to clutter my heart or my energy with that nonsense.

      • thank you- you are sweet- been absent from your blog the last few days- got the cast off and replaced with a brace- just getting back up online.

        • That’s awesome! I’m so glad you got your cast taken off and you’re healing nicely. Take care of yourself and rest if you must. Sending you lots of love and well-wishes! 💖💐🌺🌹

  4. Cherie, now this right here:
    “The hater will be kind and gentle to anyone else, even total strangers, but to the person they hate, they will only brutalize.” Love this!
    But the weapon against this pile of do-do 💩: “The bright side of being hated is this. You can choose whether to let your haters get to you or not.”

    Girlfriend, you were spot on 🎯. Now, where’s my popcorn??? 🍿🍿🍿 LMAO 🤣😆😂

  5. I’ve experienced a traumatic event not too long ago. I shared that event by writing about it on my blog and on social media. Words cannot accurately describe how painful some of the messages I received back have been. Hateful private and public messages blaming me for what happened and filling my inboxes. Text messages with terrible parenting advice and even voicemails that were cringe worthy. Your advice is easier said than done but walking away after putting my foot down and telling my story was the best thing I ever did. Deciding not to engage or read it was powerfully freeing. I’m so thankful I made the decision to not be a victim twice.

    • Oh, LaShelle! I’m so sorry this happened to you. It’s such a pathetic shame that people- especially adults, can be so mean-spirited! I’ll go to your blog and read about it. And know that my heart goes out to you! Anytime you need to come to my blog and tell your story, you’re more than welcome. Here, you’re among friends! 💖💐🌺🕊

      • I appreciate the kind words! The post you’re looking for on my blog is titled “The night I saved our lives” in case you get curious and feel like reading something that sounds more like a slice of horror than reality. Unfortunately for me, it was very much a waking reality. On a positive note, I’m thankful to have come across your feed and to be a new follower! ❤️❤️‍🩹

  6. i love the image – i have so much more for you to be mad at. know a few people who may need to see this but never will…long story…

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