Male and Female Bullies: The Differences

Female bullies can be the most vicious because they seem to be better at going undetected than male bullies. Granted, there are always exceptions to this rule, but this is true for the most part. Male bullies lean more toward outward physical bullying and females lean more toward bullying of the psychological variety.

Female Bullies:

I’ll say again but more descriptively. Although there are exceptions, most are passive-aggressive and commit much of their bullying on a psychological level. However, thanks to radical feminism and the moral decline in today’s young girls and women, physical assaults perpetrated by females are increasing at an alarming rate.

Females bully by Dividing and Conquering – attacking the targets’ relationships. Girls and women use smear campaigns, gossip, rumors, and witch hunts. These tactics are all designed to turn everyone against the target- ’Isolation of the target’.

They also use projection- projecting all of their own shortcomings onto the target. Bullies do have flaws and their greatest fear is having them exposed. Projection is the best way to keep their own imperfections hidden.

Therefore, they project their imperfections onto the target. Also, these bullies will use distraction- distracting others’ attention away from their own shortcomings and evil deeds. Bullies do this by pointing out the negative qualities in their targets.

Psychological v/s Physical Bullying

Girls and some boys, use psychological warfare. Psychological bullying includes but is not limited to exclusion, dirty looks, taunts, insults, rumors and lies. Also, it can include thievery, invasion of the target’s privacy and destruction of the target’s property and relationships.

If this does not work, they then may resort to violence although not as often as male bullies. If females want to cause bodily harm to their target, they are more likely to persuade someone else to do their violence for them.

They may send a male friend or a bigger and tougher female friend, to catch the target alone and physically assault them. Moreover, they get them to comply by offering incentives. These girls may offer either illicit sex to their male friend to get them to do what they want. On the other hand, they may offer a tougher female friend inclusion into their particular clique and the chance to climb up the social ladder.

Passive-aggressive bullies may also offer money.

By primal instinct, females are nurturers.  Nature has hardwired girls and women toward maintaining relationships whether they be familial, friendships, or romantic. Many young girls plan to eventually get married and have families of their own.

Thus, female bullies aim to sabotage the target’s relationships. Most girls and women, from the time they are small, dream of one day finding a mate and having children because they have an instinct to nurture. They are usually the caretakers of the family and home.

Covert v/s Overt Bullying

Therefore, it should not be any surprise that female bullies are notorious for calling their targets names like ‘whore’, ‘slut’, ‘tramp’, ‘floosy’ and other names which attack the femininity and virtues.

Moreover, anytime you as a young lady are called either one of these names, there is an even deeper meaning behind it. Therefore, here’s the hidden meaning. It’s that you are not marriageable. Also, you are not worthy of a mate or children, and you are not considered to be a woman.

A female bully wants to brainwash you. Hence the reason why her attacks are so vicious and repetitive. She wants to convince you that you are worthless and will stop at nothing to make you believe it!

toxic brainwashing

Additionally, she knows that if she can make you believe the lies, there is a strong chance that you will live up to them. We are what we believe. This vicious shrew knows that if she could drum it into your head, she will succeed in breaking your spirit. Thus, making you prove her right.

Females Aren’t Always the Weaker Sex

 Get this straight. Female bullies WANT you to live up to the names that they call you. If they call you a whore, what they really want is for you to BE one.

So don’t live up to it! Show her up! However, she will not give up so easily. Girls tend to hang on to their hatred of another girl to the point of obsession. The bullying becomes a ritual. And when you stand up to a bully, don’t expect things to get better anytime soon.

Male bullies:

Because nature has hardwired most males to be the hunter and gatherer, guys tend to be more physical. And why not? Back during prehistoric times, males had to hunt and bring home the food to feed their families. Often, they had to fight off wild animals and human males of other groups in order to survive.

Although there are exceptions, males are more likely to use physical aggression. Young men are expected to be strong and tough…to display manhood. Therefore, if the target is another male, the boy bully will not only use his fists, but will also try to feminize their target by repetitively emasculating him.

Emasculation of Male Targets

Male bullies often call their targets names like, “sissy”, “pussy”, “bitch” and other names which attack the male pride and cause them to feel less like men. They try to strip their target of his manhood.

And if the male target speaks out against the treatment, the male bully will trivialize it by referring to the target as a “whiner” and tell him to “toughen up”, or “man up”. The male bully may also accuse his male victim of going against what is seen as “man-code” if he dares to report the bullying.

And male bullies who are physically violent usually beat up on males and females. However, there are a few who are so cowardly that they’ll never stand up against another guy but only beat up on girls.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

12 thoughts on “Male and Female Bullies: The Differences

  1. Pingback: Male and Female Bullies: The Differences – Tonya LaLonde

  2. This is an excellent post! I really enjoyed reading it. You are so right about women and girls.

    One of the main things I had noticed about some women indeed is their very subtle but very impactful tactic of exclusion that hurts other women.

    In addition to this, I have observed the other things you have mentioned as female tactics.

    There are women who indeed can be extremely nasty and evil, but they are more slick and sneaky about it.

    Covert, undercover, passive aggressive. Thank you for continually educating people about this stuff. Sometimes, people may be in some of these situations and have not recognized those situations for what they are. This will be very helpful for them.
    💜💜🙏🏾

  3. Great conversation here. You know there are some good points here and there seems to be more and more gender crossing on some of these things too. I have often said in many cases females are worse than males when it comes to bullying. I have even known male friends to get into it, step outside and duke it out and then the next day they are fine with each other. With girls it is often for a lifetime and it seems to me that workplace bullying seems to be more female dominated. A lot of it is as you said more psychological and a lot of victim shaming. And with the physical bullying there is some of that with the big, tough strong girl and I will also say this there are some female bullies to males who may even use physical bullying against a male and even if she is wearing him out, if he fights back try to play the gender card. That is why we need to have awareness of psychological and physical and just admit it is a problem that can happen to all ages and both genders are capable of doing it.

    • You’re so right about everything you said here! Especially the part where you stated that women hold grudges for a lifetime while men usually patch it up. Many men can fight one night and go have a beer together the next night.

  4. You described this so well! As someone who had a younger sister bullied by girls and myself was bullied once at an office, you hit the nail right on the head. They often attack the virtues you hold most dear be it your empathy, gentle nature, etc. And yes men who internalize that need to feel more “masculine” than other men tend to physically bully those they feel threatened by. While some men are stunningly good at passive aggressiveness, it is usually women who do this when they bully.

    • I’m so sorry you and your little sister were bullied, Sara. That’s one of the hardest battles to fight. You’re right with everything you mentioned, sweetie! 💔

    • Thank you so much, Vanya. And you’re right, it’s sad. 💔But, as difficult as it may be, targets can reclaim their power by seeing the bullying for what it is and where it comes from.

  5. Pingback: Bullied Boys and Bullied Girls - Chateau Cherie

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