Sadly, We Teach People How to Treat Us- It’s a Subconscious Thing.

bullying bullied blame victim

Here’s something which most targets of bullying don’t realize. Not even I knew this at the time I was being bullied.

You teach people how to treat you. And how do you teach them this? By how well you treat yourself– by what you will and will not put up with and by the boundaries you set.

Sadly, after being bullied and abused for so long, a person can be conditioned to accept and allow bad behavior and disrespect from other people. Remember that prolonged bullying is a form of brainwashing and hypnosis. It slowly rewires your brain and forces you to “let” people walk over you.

However, know that it doesn’t have to be this way. You can retrain your brain and reclaim your dignity and the life you so deserve.

To put it plainly, you can either allow unsavory people into your life, letting them abuse and degrade you or you can put your foot down, call them on their unacceptable behavior, and give them the old heave-ho. You decide.

I have to admit. When I was being bullied years ago, I unwittingly let my classmates tear me down. I gave them the power to determine how I felt about myself- the power that never belonged to them in the first place.

I didn’t have the courage to stand up to them properly and I let the hurtful words and the physical assaults make me feel terrible about myself.

bullied depressed

I gave up on schoolwork and my grades plummeted. I gave up on my talents and stopped doing what I enjoyed. I allowed them to turn me against myself.

I can’t even pretend it was all their fault. Because I allowed them to steal my confidence- without knowing it or meaning to, of course. Nevertheless, I let it happen, so some of the blame is on me.

But the good news is, they may have brought me down but they couldn’t keep me there. Eventually, I wised up and saw my value as both a human being and as a woman.

I can’t stress enough the importance of loving yourself first and foremost. Love should come from within and you should never look to any outside source for it. Love yourself and all of your imperfections, for we are all “perfectly flawed.”

narcissist bully confident

Accept and respect yourself. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do to be accepted and for someone to love you. If a person does not want to see you for the beautiful person that you are, you can’t make them. However, you do have the choice of whether or not to keep them in your life.

With bullies, however, this may or may not change their behavior toward you, and the worst-case scenario might even make it worse. However, you aren’t looking to change anyone’s attitude, you’re looking to take care of yourself and to achieve your own peace and happiness.

It’s not about changing them, it’s about looking out for yourself and keeping your dignity and self-respect. It’s about taking appropriate measures to make you feel good.

Know your worth. Open your eyes to your value. And treat yourself better. Because if you don’t treat yourself right, no one will.

After Being Bullied for So Long, Targets Can Seemingly Grow Accustomed to It

bullied caution tape

It’s one of the most heartbreaking aspects of being bullied- enduring it for so long that you finally grow accustomed to it and resign yourself. Sadly, targets eventually grow numb because the bullying has gone on for so long that the attacks don’t even hurt anymore.

What happens it that you get so used to the torment that the more subtle attacks no longer sound cruel. Some people think that targets are better off when they no longer realize they’re being bullied. But are they really?

toxic brainwashing

I don’t know. In some instances, yes, and in others, no. If you don’t react because you don’t know to, some bullies will get bored with the lack of response and leave you alone. But others will only bully you worse because either they know you didn’t catch it, or they get angry because you must be ignoring them.

Either way, there comes a point when the target just says, “F it!” and doesn’t care anymore. In order to survive and keep your sanity, sometimes it becomes a necessity not to give a damn until you can find a way out.

Why You Should NEVER Hate Yourself

In today’s backwards culture, we are continuously encouraged to hate ourselves, especially if we fall under certain criteria. You know what I’m talking about.

Also, we’re being brainwashed into believing that if we hate ourselves because of some kind of “privilege,” or because we’re Americans, or Westerners, or middle class, or because we own a business, whatever, then it shows that we’re “woke.” It’s virtue signaling at its finest, and it’s all a bunch of hogwash!

Here’s why you shouldn’t hate yourself no matter what anyone, including your bullies, the media, and certain politicians tell you:

If they can get you to hate yourself, then they can make you self-destruct. Understand that if you hate yourself, it isn’t to your own benefit, it’s only to theirs (bullies, media, politicians, the elite, etc.) Also, if they can get you to hate yourself, they can talk you into doing the most degrading and demeaning things- like bow down and kneel before other people.

Anyone who can get you to hate yourself can make you feel guilty for things that you had nothing to do with and that aren’t your fault, get you to subjugate yourself, and make you feel that you must “atone” for that guilt.

Depression Concept with Word Cloud and a Humanbeing with broken Brain and Heavy Rain

Understand that people who hate themselves are easily led because they are yes-people too eager to please. They try so hard to show the rest of the world, they’re morally good- that they’re above certain things. These people will jump through hoops to prove they’re decent people.

But folks, if you already know yourself and know without a doubt that you’re a good, moral, and decent person, why then would you feel you must bend over backwards and make such a concerted effort to prove that?

You wouldn’t. Because you know that the goodness, morals, and decency are already there whether others know it or not. Your conscience is clear, and you know that you’ve done nothing wrong. Therefore, you instinctively know that anything the media, politicians, or anyone on the street might put out does not apply to you.

Anyone who virtue signals- who has to work so hard and put on a show to prove something to others can’t have a clear conscience- so they must pander, virtue signal, and really strain themselves not only to prove to the rest of the world that they’re on top of the moral mountain, but to ease their guilty conscience.

On the other hand, if your conscience is clear and you know that none of the narratives apply to you, you wouldn’t waste your time and energy trying to prove it.

‘Know where I’m going with this? Great! I thought that you would!

No matter where you come from,  it’s best to love yourself just the way God made you and turn a deaf ear to the lies of The Enemy!