Good news for victims and survivors of bullying! Resources to help people who are bullied are everywhere today. I recently spoke with Kathy Noll, an author of “Taking the Bully by The Horns. Since the 1990’s she has worked tirelessly to reach out to young people whom are bullied. I very much admire her work.
Keep up the great work!
Here is a list of her awards and accolades!
1996-Present: In recognition of successful completion of the requisite Course of Study “Writing for Children and Teenagers” and on nomination by its faculty, Kathy Noll was awarded a diploma from the Institute of Children’s Literature where she studied for two years. She also received an award through the Writers’ International Forum for her work. Her short stories and articles have been published in magazines along with interviews.
She recently was awarded with the title of “Woman of the Year” from Glamour Magazine for “Changing a Child’s World for the Better.” She also received Toyota’s “Moving Forward” award. And in 2007, she was honored with commendations from The State Senator’s Office, The Mayor’s Office, and the Council of the City of Reading. In addition, Kathy received her school’s “Most Distinguished Alumni” award.
NBC news has worked with Kathy to monitor classrooms in Philadelphia for bullying behavior. She also has directly helped many children with their personal bullying issues through her books, online counseling, research, educational and family-related Internet chats, message board hosting, and website.
Kathy has spoken on numerous Radio and Television Shows discussing the topics of Bullying, School Violence, and Self-esteem. She also works as a consultant for various TV News & Talk Shows, and was recently asked to be the expert testimony for a new children’s literature infomercial through Buena Vista (Disney).
Writing “Taking the Bully by the Horns” has generated many letters of thanks from both adults and children. Students frequently ask permission to use her research-based information for their projects.
She has excelled in publishing and marketing her books–reaching people all over the globe–educating, inspiring, and empowering them. She has networked with many organizations, schools, anti-violence agencies, mental health professionals, anti-bullying advocates, and child educators both Nationally and Internationally.
“Taking the Bully by the Horns” has also been published in Croatia. The Ministry of Education placed the book in schools all over the country and is having great success with it.
Following up on the success of “Taking the Bully by the Horns,” a much-requested Bullying Workbook has been created by Kathy — “The EDA Workbook” — and she also recently collaborated on a new book for adults on Adult Bullies and Bullying in the Work Place entitled “101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life.”
YOU’RE THE WEAK ONE
You’re the weak one, you’re a bully.
The weak one is definitely not me.
The bully is always the weak one, but your weakness, you can’t seem to clearly see. So, I’m going to try and shed a little light on your weak and inappropriate ways. Your weakness began on your very first bullying day.
Your false sense of power is not strength at all; it’s a cry for help desperately trying to break through.
I actually feel a little sorry for you.
Weak bullies like you always seek to find other kids they can dominate.
Bullies do this with vicious words, distasteful actions, and misguided hate.
Is being a weak bully the banner you want to carry for the rest of your life?
Get rid of the bully banner forever; create one that shows respect, understanding, and tolerance for others, and always proudly hold that one very high.
By Al Johnson,
Bullies Be Gone!
It’s time for the next subject for my 2018 author interview series. Author interviews are posted every Friday throughout the year.
I am honored to continue this series with California author and blogger Tina Frisco.
You can catch up with all of my past author interviews (nearly 200) on my Author Directory page.
If you’re an author interested in being interviewed in this series, I still have limited spots available for 2018. You can email me at email@example.com
Now, please enjoy this interview with Tina Frisco:
Do you try more to be original or to deliver to readers what they want?
I aim to do both, because both are needed for books to sell. But I won’t compromise originality, so at times it becomes a bit of a juggling act. I write because I enjoy it and am compelled to so. Writing is my life’s blood. And like most writers…
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If you were ever a victim of bullying, it more than likely did the same for you. This is not to say that abuse of any form is a good thing because no one should ever be bullied…EVER! However, though painful and humiliating when it was happening, having been bullied has had its positive takeaways, one of which is my fine-tuned ability to smell bulls*** from a mile away.
Judging from my own experience and having heard stories of others whom have endured the same, being a target of bullies has a way of giving you an almost psychic ability to see through people and detect true motives and intentions.
It gave me the ability to observe a large group of people, then spot and pick out the fakes and troublemakers at lightning speed and with complete accuracy. I don’t have to speak a word to anyone, only stand back and watch.
Just as a person who loses his sight experiences a much keener sense of hearing, a victim of bullying quickly grows the ability to read people like a newspaper. Why? Out of sheer necessity. Many survivors are able to read body language like an FBI agent, deciphering the tiniest of micro-expressions. In fact, one can even pick up on the vibes others put out…especially negative ones.
When any certain skill is mandatory for your survival, nature gives you no choice but to quickly hon that skill and use it to near perfection.
I consider this sixth sense to be a gift. However, this gift came at a heavy price.
via ABOUT TSRA
For those of you who love to write or are readers who are looking for fresh new stories, I recommend following Chris Graham’s “The Story Reading Ape”. This is an awesome website and blog which hosts new guest authors and their books and novels. He also includes insightful information about how to become an even better writer/author and the best magazines and companies to which to submit your articles and short stories.
I’m very happy to have found Chris’ site and I can guarantee that you will be also!
For writers who have considered flash fiction and short stories.
On The Write Life site:
Not sure where to send those great short stories you’ve written?
As with writing contests and fellowships, sometimes it can be hard to know where to begin. To help you figure out where to submit short stories, we’ve put together this guide to 23 publications that publish short fiction. The list includes a mix of publications across various genres and styles, ranging from prestigious, highly competitive options to those specifically seeking new and emerging voices.
While we’ll give you a brief idea of the flavor of each magazine and site, you’ll definitely want to spend some time reading your target publications before submitting to become familiar with the sort of pieces they prefer. And before hitting “send,” make sure you’re not making any of these submission mistakes!
Ready to get started?
This is is about gaslighting and is worth the read. Although it happens in the workplace, it can also happen in schools. As we know school bullies often gaslight their victims to make them look crazy and to avoid accountability. Gaslighting is a type of manipulation to make the target of bullying doubt their own sanity or feel/seem crazy.
Gaslighting is a form of deliberate manipulation intended to disorient, confuse, and frighten those on the receiving end. Many discussions about gaslighting occur in reference to personal relationships, often in the context of domestic or partner abuse. However, gaslighting can occur in other settings as well, including workplaces. In fact, I predict that we’ll be hearing a lot more about gaslighting at work during the years to come, and I’d like to survey that waterfront.
In her excellent book The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life, (2018 pb ed. with rev. intro), Dr. Robin Stern defines gaslighting as:
a type of emotional manipulation in which a gaslighter tries to convince you that you’re misremembering, misunderstanding, or misinterpreting your own behavior or motivations, thus creating doubt in your mind that leaves you vulnerable and confused. Gaslighters might be men or women…
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It’s no secret that Taylor Swift, one of the most famous celebs of our time, has been bullied both during school and in the adult world. From being bullied by classmates who were resentful of her talent, to having the microphone rudely ripped from her, to being bullied by other celebrities on social media and in their songs (Swish-Swish, Bish), to being bullied only by everyday people who shame her for daring to speak out. I both admire and hurt for her. In my opinion, this young lady has handled the roasting with maturity and grace.
I’ve seen comments on social media…comments which shame her for speaking out and letting her feelings be known. The messages I get from these comments are these:
1. Taylor’s feelings aren’t valid or they don’t count.
2. She has no right to feel hurt.
3. Because she is a celebrity, she has no right to feel those feelings or to voice them.
This is total NONSENSE!
What people fail to realize is that even the rich and famous have feelings. Rich or not, famous or not, this young lady is a human being. She is flesh and blood like the rest of us. So, who is anyone to tell her that she is wrong for feeling the way she does, her stance against bullying, or speaking out against bullying?
Some may see her as a crybaby, but others see her as a strong and brave young lady. To speak out and know well the risk of being perceived as weak, being blamed or worse, retaliated against? That takes courage! To face pushback and still refuse to be quiet about it? That takes GRIT! Any target of bullying who continues to stand their ground despite any backlash they face is, in my opinion, a hero…to themselves and to others who are in the same predicament.
Moreover, Taylor Swift is a shining example that no one…NO ONE is immune to being bullied. Not even the rich and famous! You can have all the fame, all the money, all the power, all the looks and beauty, all the popularity and all the talent and still find yourself to be a victim of bullies.
Anytime a person is a target, it’s much easier to hide it out of shame. It’s much easier and safer to stay silent in hopes that the harassment you endure will just magically go away. It’s much easier to act like everything is okay when it really isn’t.
However, the reality of it is this: You can clam up about it, you can hide it, you can fake it and act like everything is alright all…day…long! But the harassment will not magically go away and the bullies will not magically get lives and leave you in peace. No. They will come for you whether you speak out or not.
Keep speaking out, Taylor!
Today, I would have just told him “No” and let that be the end of it. The year was 1997 and I was 26 years old and seven years post high school when I ran into a guy who had harassed me mercilessly during high school. During that time I was lead singer of a band and we were doing a show at a nightclub in Memphis. It was during a fifteen-minute break between sets that I ran into him and I’ll have to admit, he was very charming, displaying the very charm which had allowed him to go undetected and escape accountability all those years ago.
I was cordial to him as I’d been to everyone who had come to watch the band. However, when he asked me out, instead of feeling honored, I felt quite insulted. My first thoughts were:
“You’ve got some nerve, buddy!”
“Do you not remember all the times during school you helped make me feel completely worthless?”
“Do you not remember all the horrible names you called me? All the taunts? The jokes?”
“What make’s you think that I’d be even REMOTELY interested?”
Honestly, I would’ve had to have been either stupid or desperate to go on a date with the likes of him and I believed his reasoning for it was one of either three things:
1. It was much safer for him to take me out now that we were out of school and he no longer had to face the old high school clique on a daily basis.
2. He thought I was desperate.
3. He thought I was easy.
This only made me angrier. Then I smiled and said, “Let’s talk about it after the show.”
After the show ended, we talked and I agreed to go on a date with him the following weekend. We agreed to meet at a restaurant in a neighboring town. Only I never showed up.
When he called me the next day and wanted to know why I had stood him up, informing me that he’d waited for over an hour, my response was, “You don’t know? You don’t remember all the times you made me feel so bad about myself during school? You don’t remember all the horrible names you called me? You don’t remember all the times you joined everyone else in humiliating me during school? You knew I was hurting and you didn’t give a damn! You knew I was dying inside and you didn’t care! Well, how does it feel, buster?” I shouted.
He apologized profusely, over and over again. But at that time, I just wasn’t ready to forgive him.
It was a rotten thing to do to someone, I know. However, at that time, I wasn’t as mature as I am now and I just had to make a point.
It took a while but things worked out in the end. I eventually forgave him and we became close friends.