Don’t Explain Yourself to The Wrong People

I’ve known people who felt like they had to explain themselves to everyone and, back in the day, I was bad about doing the same thing. But here’s what I’ve learned.

You shouldn’t explain yourself to people who mean very little to you, and that includes bullies and haters. It’s amazing how we waste so much of our time and energy caring about what others think of us- people whose opinions of us have absolutely no bearing on us or our lives!

I want you to understand that there will always be people who judge you negatively without knowing you. It’s a part of life. And those who say the most about you are usually the ones who know the least about you. So, why do you place so much value on their opinions?

Now, I could understand if the person means a lot to you. Longing to be accepted is human nature and we’re all hardwired to desire human connection. And naturally, it’s good to value opinions of our families, friends, and those who love us and want best for us because their opinions of us are credible and we value their opinions.

However, a bully or hater’s opinion isn’t credible, has no value and shouldn’t matter at all. Because these people add nothing to our lives, they only take away!

So, again, are people who are of no benefit to us whatsoever even worth the energy expenditure? Should what they think of us even matter? And do their meaningless opinions have any bearing on our lives? Are they a superior at work or school and do they have the power to determine what happens to us?

Crazy young man in white shirt standing and screaming at woman in pink dress. woman dont care and looking at camera with toothy smile. indoor studio shot, isolated on light brown background.

If not, I’d chalk their opinions and talk up as just a bunch of noise that needs to be muted because they aren’t worthy of any explanations or apologies.

21 thoughts on “Don’t Explain Yourself to The Wrong People

  1. Pingback: Don’t Explain Yourself to The Wrong People – Tonya LaLonde

  2. While people’s opinions didn’t matter that much to me when I got out of the service, what frustrated me was people’s ignorance. It seemed few people in 80s Reagan America bothered to accept that I only grew my hair long when I got out was down to having to wear a crew cut for four years in the service of my country. The fact, that I wanted to ignore this ignorance seemed to wind people up more.

    • That’s because they weren’t getting what they wanted out of you- a reaction. Often, when bullies don’t get the reaction they want, they double down. But the good thing is that, when they double down, they tend to become redundant. Then they end up boring people with their nonsense. Sometimes you must wind them up to expose them.

  3. Pingback: Don’t Explain Yourself to The Wrong People — Chateau Cherie | Vermont Folk Troth

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