Bullies Who Use Doublespeak

Bullies are slick with their insults. Many times, they may disguise their vitriol and contempt with the use of doublespeak.

The term “doublespeak” comes from George Orwell’s book “1984” and a person uses it when he uses euphemisms and words that sound more palatable to the ears. Bullies use doublespeak to sound concerned rather than hateful to keep from turning other people off.

For example:

A bully is degrading and defaming their target. But rather than being blunt and saying,

“I can’t stand him, he’s batshit crazy and he belongs in the nuthouse!” the bully will instead say,

“I’m very concerned about him. I think he has a mental imbalance somewhere that hasn’t been addressed. I hope he gets the help he needs.”

The first version would make the bully sound like the person she truly is- a nasty old shrew! The second version sounds so much better and makes the bully look like a good person who’s genuinely concerned for the target.

Here’s another example:

A bully is putting her neighbor down. But rather than say,

“I’d like to catch her in the street and beat the living crap out of her and leave her to die!” which would make the bully sound like a vindictive and hateful bitch, she says,

“If she doesn’t change her attitude, I’m afraid someone’s going to hurt her really bad!”

Again, the second version sounds so much better because it shows concern rather than hatred for the target and it also makes the target look like she must be bringing the bad treatment on herself.

It’s not what you say. It’s how you say it and the nonverbal communication you use with it that makes all the difference. It’s too easy to bully someone without looking like a bully!

Believe it or not, if you’re a target, you know when you’re being bullied no matter how covert your bullies may be. The trick is to call it out in the early stages before the sneaky attacks become a habit or a set pattern.

Never let anyone grow too comfortable with abusing you. Once they do, the abuse will escalate until it  gets so out of control that people won’t even try to hide it! And that’s when you will be in grave danger!

Again! Call it out in the early stages. It’s the only way you’ll be able to put a stop to it!

24 thoughts on “Bullies Who Use Doublespeak

  1. I wish my teachers had had this sort of mindset when I was bullied at school in front of them and they just turned a blind eye. I wasn’t in any position to confront them or make them stop but they could have done something. I definitely don’t miss those days…😔😔

    • I don’t blame you, sweetie. My heart goes out to you for what you had to endure. And in most cases, teachers aren’t only complacent when your classmates bully you, sometimes they encourage it if they happen not to like the student being bullied. Know that you have my support. 💖💐🌹

  2. Yes, this sooo much! This happened at school and even some teachers joined in saying mean things in such “kind” ways…
    My last relationship also had my ex talking about me like that to people I thought of as friends. I was too blind to see that it wasn’t real concern but her narcissistic bullying… Now I see! After I’ve been hurt badly.
    Thank you for addressing this! I’ll repost it on my site for more exposure! 🤗

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  5. You’re on point once again Cherie. “Never let anyone grow too comfortable with abusing you.” 🤬 Girlfriend, I agree with your message. It’s a surefire bet that when they get comfortable abusing you, the more discomfort and trauma you will be in. Tragic! 😫

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