1 Reason Having Enemies Is Better Than Having Frenemies

Targets often pick “friends” who only tolerate them or those who wish them ill will because they’re often lonely and desperate. For so long, they have been wrongly alienated from others due to rumors and lies that bullies have spread about them to keep them from making friends.

Because the target is so hungry for a connection…any connection, he/she will befriend anyone…and I mean anyone! They are not selective with who they call “friend” and end up latching on to people who are not even worth knowing…predators, who only take advantage.

Also, young victims often assume that to be “cool,” they have to have a big circle of friends. This is not true.

With that being said, I want you to know that if you are a victim of bullying, you do not need a whole slew of people in your life to be happy nor to feel like or be a whole person. You only need your family and a few true friends. It’s safer this way. Wouldn’t you much rather have just a handful of true friends than to have an abundance of frenemies? I know I would.

In fact, you should prefer to have enemies over ‘frenemies’. Here’s why:

1. With an enemy, you know exactly where they stand without having to do any guesswork. However, you will always be the last to know with frenemies after being played for a sucker.

In other words, enemies won’t hide their contempt for you. Frenemies, on the other hand, will always hide their contempt for you behind the facade of friendship. And they do this to keep you close so they can find out your deepest secrets, your dreams, your goals, and your not-so-attractive characteristics.

And once they know all these intimate details about you, they will then weaponize it and use it against you.

If at any time you wonder about a person…if your intuition is telling you that something is “off,” put some distance between yourself and that individual and do it fast! Instinct is trying to warn you.

If your so-called friends are only tolerating you, stabbing you in the back, or sabotaging you in any way, it’s time to eighty-six of these leaches to your self-esteem. And the sooner you do, the better!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

29 thoughts on “1 Reason Having Enemies Is Better Than Having Frenemies

  1. I really liked this post in particular because I have been other people’s sucker too many times. I for one think the world of my friends while some of my ‘friends’ think little of me as evidenced by their put downs and belittling ways. I am loyal to a fault and have worked on self improvement much of my life and I make the mistake of thinking others are like me. Maybe I project my good qualities into them or I’m not ready for the next trick to be played on me because it’s something that I wouldn’t do myself.

    • I’m so sorry, Ruby. These people sound toxic, sweetie. Anyone who puts you down doesn’t deserve to be in your life. And I know it gets lonely when you don’t have friends. But you’re lonely anyway when you have friends who treat you like crap. My heart goes out to you. 💔 Uou deserve better.

  2. Absolutely!! I am very selective about who I allow in my personal life, it’s the best way to be safe. I spend a lot of time alone and like it that way, no one to answer too! I have a few close friends, some whom have known me many years and just some I go for walks with or sit around a beach fire with. When you are a target of Bullying, you have to be careful.

    • You’re absolutely right, Stella- you have to be very careful. 💯 But it sounds like your small circle you keep are pretty good friends and I’m glad you have them in your life. Wishing you many more blessings! 💖🌺🦋🌞

  3. Frenemies are worse than enemies, indeed. We can never help trusting enemies and are always conscious and aware in their presence. But frenemies are just… sort of….. vague!!!

  4. Agreed, I see it in action every day. That stranger looking around the room for someone ro wind up, that man on the bus chatting up everybody. They are looking for supply, it is not personal. The wolves in sheep clothing you mention are by far the most insidious. Communal narcissists. Look up the term read how to ID these foes so you can disengage.

  5. True !!!
    I mean we know that enemies will stab us, so be safe from them.
    But from frenemies, we never know when they will strike 🤷🏻‍♂️
    I’ve been bullied so I know this, your blog is relatable, I have very few friends but only the true ones.

  6. I would like to say that I really enjoy following and reading your writings. It is with great interest that I read and review the publications, especially on the theme of bullying. Merci beaucoup pour ces partages et très bonne journée a vous. Mon niveau en anglais est très élémentaire.
    Toutes mes amitiés. Joseph

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